When Your Message Hits an Upper Limit
I’ve re-read The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks at least five times. I first heard about this book from a former coach of mine, and it was a total game-changer for me. Now, I share it with clients at pivotal moments, often when we’re working on expanding visibility, refining messages, or leaning into the idea that something bigger is trying to emerge.
The concept that shifted things for me was The Upper Limit Problem.
In the book, Hendricks asks: “How long can you sustain the flow of good feeling inside without doing something to knock it back down?”
The ULP is our tendency to unconsciously sabotage our success and happiness when it exceeds a certain threshold that we subconsciously believe we deserve. That internal ceiling, built on the belief that you’re only allowed to grow to a certain point, shows up everywhere, including your message.
Your Message Hits Its Ceiling First
It often happens like this:
You have insight that could shift the perspective of people in your industry, but you soften the framing so it feels a little more palatable.
You know you’re starting to bump up against that upper limit when your posts feel bland, even though you’re saying all the “right” things.
In many cases, just like I said last week, you already know there’s a message deep inside you. It won’t quit nagging at you, but you keep pushing it away until it feels safe or “more clear.”
Sometimes, when you’re on the verge of sharing you feel low-grade anxiety, swirling in the pit of your stomach. You second-guess the draft. You edit out the line that had the most punch. You hit publish, but immediately want to pull it back.
That’s your Upper Limit in action.
I call this the Big Idea Threshold, the invisible line between what we feel safe saying and what we know we’re meant to say. This threshold isn’t just about words. It’s about crossing the boundary of your old identity and the one that’s kept you small, safe, and "liked."
My own ceiling breaking moment
Last week, I shared about my journey to my own big idea. My Big Idea Threshold kept me from saying what I really believe about women’s voices and what we’re called to do.
I tried word-smithing, running it through ChatGPT a million times, and pushing it away out of fear of what others might say. I stalled and hesitated until it hurt.
So let me be clear about my big idea:
When women stop filtering their message to be palatable and start speaking the unvarnished truth of what they see, know, and are here to change, they don’t just grow businesses, they start revolutions.
Revolutions is a big word, and I know in saying that, I’ll push some people away.
But I also know that until I am willing to risk speaking it out loud, to hone in on the exact right women who believe the same thing, who are committed to big, bold, audacious industry-changing action, everything I’m trying to do in the world will stay stuck.
You can’t expand beyond your Big Idea Threshold without naming it and claiming it.
Your big idea is probably buried in your hesitation.
If you’re feeling friction, fear, or resistance, these are signs. They’re signals that your next-level message is trying to come through you. To help you move through this, try this exercise.
Find 10 minutes. Turn off everything, get ground, and breathe. When you’re ready, ask yourself:
What core system or narrative am I tired of accepting?
If I didn’t worry about being liked, what headline would I write or thing would I say?
What idea or thing lights me up… but also afraid to say?
What’s been whispering inside me, saying: This is the part you’ve been avoiding?
This isn’t meant to be some pristine thought exercise. Let it be messy. The work is in peeling back the layers, so you can get to the core. This is your big idea before you polish it.
If you’ve ever sat in a conversation and thought, “This is not right…”
If your chest aches when you catch yourself buffering, refining, or avoiding…
Then this is your invitation to break through your Big Idea Threshold.
I know it takes courage to do this work, and it’s that very same courage that could be the breakthrough that changes everything.
If you’re ready to go all in, fear and all, then join me for The Big Idea Sprint, a 10-day intensive to unlock your big idea, build confidence, and create visibility assets that finally bring it out into the light!
